Stab picks me up. We are running late. I have a major disaster of a hang over. We load our shit in the car. Off we go on our merry way. You see the night before was dollar drink night at the Usual. I just got off work and couldn’t turn that down. The amout of sleep we got was practically nothing.

Feeling like shit we got ourselves a few soda’s. Once we were a couple of hours into our trip. The caffeine pills helped a little. The directions were a little confusing.

Soon we were almost there. YEP, YEP, YEP!!! This did not drive Steve crazy. There are plenty of cows on the road and in the mountains. My ears get plugged.

Wellp, we’re almost there! We get lost again. Thanks to people on the street we find our way. I just relized I forgot to bring a jacket.

Once at dogg’s house we scoop him up and head to the practice spot, but first we get us some ice cold brew! Dogg and Stab go for Black and Tans. I experiment with some new imports. The jam goes well. kickin it cold hahdcoah wit da laydeez. yo yo yo .. wuz drinkin up a storm.

DAY TWO May 5 2000:

We stayed up all night getting drunk and jamming. So, we are really hung over! Me and Stab crash until two. Dogg goes off to work earlier on. Me and Stab get up and shower up. We head to Huntington Beach hopefully to check out chicks. Nobody is there. It SUCKS!!! It cost six bucks to park...wasted beer money!

Off to the practice spot to meet Dogg after we have a bottom. Del Taco has a 39 cent taco deal, but we got lost and forgot to pick up Doggs chick. Feeling much better having eaten we load our shit up.

Once at Club Mesa we load our shit in and get ready for sound check, but first we score a couple cold brews. We go for Bass. Club Mesa sells huge mugs for six bucks.

After sound check we get our make-up and masks on and start playing. The crowd goes wild. Especially an old fart by the name of Puppetmaster.

Dead on the Web.com

gets a couple of good shots of us and offers to do a review of our show. We adjourn to the back to sell our merchandise. We get payed for our performance in BEER!!!

After looking like a bunch of complete jack-asses (especially myself) in front of several beautiful women while drunken sloshed and shitfaced we head back to Dogg’s house to drink some more beer in Dogg’s garage.

DAY THREE may 6 2000:

After nearly clobbering each other silly with wicker chairs and plastic baseball bats over an Animals record in Dogg’s garage we managed to pass out in Dogg’s apartment sometime early morning, but we have to get up a couple hours later and shower up to hit the road again. I talked Dogg into feeding me since I spent all my money on BEER!!!

Once clean and full we load our shit and saddle up for Merced, leaving Costa Mesa behind. Off to Merced party capital of the world. It’s the party capital, becuase of all the cow’s taking shits. Turn over the shit and what yummie fungus you see!!!!

Half way to Merced we stop at a gas station. I try to take a leak and shit, but some Klown is in the john, so I piss behind the store. Then I get a Cherry Coke. Dogg gets a can of whoop-ass and opens the sumbitch. Stab goes with the BEER nuts.

Quarter of the way there we stop at another gas station, cause Dogg dumb-ass didn’t get gas, but that’s okay, cause I still got to take a shit (remember Klown was in the john?). Not only do I have to take a shit, but I got to jack off too! Once I take care of that we head out.

We arrive in Merced, party capital of the world. We load our shit in and get ready. Darrin of the Fatty Mocha is glad to see us. I ask him if he has a knife to cut lemons. Puzzled, he agrees and hands me a knife.

We sound check then put our mask on and play. The crowd goes twice as wild as the night before. Several underaged heavy set groupies give me a stiffy while I am playing. Inbetween songs I take a tug off good ol’ Jim Beam and bit the lemon.

About fifteen or sixteen minutes into our set, Darrin tells us last song so we fuse together six songs into one and rock like hell!!!

Once our sets over we adjourn out doors to the parking lot to have a couple BEERS!!!

Darrin invites us and one other band to crash over night at the Club and pays us. We all party it up and get shit faced

LAST DAY May 7 2000: We wake up in the morning burnt out and feeling like shit after a five day drinking binge and rock n roll. We gather our shit, wash up in the shitter and head out. Before leaving town we stop at a near by In and Out Urge and have some chow and bottom. Then we head back to San Jo and Dogg back to Fullerton.

THE EnD